A transplanted Floridian calls it as he sees it...

I promise to tell all! I'll be as rufff as I have to.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Hi everyone.

I know I should be blogging more, but it's been really boring around here. Mommy's back at work (although I keep hearing it's a new work), and I've been in my crate a lot.

Hudson's been boycotting the new floor, but I think it looks nice. It's really cool and relaxing to sleep on. I like it. I also found these things called "tools" to be quite fascinating. I am thinking of starting my own collection.

Well, this is short I know, but I've got to go sniff Smudgie's bum now. He's sleeping, and it freaks him out when I sneak up from behind. I make sure my nose is extra cold and wet first.

Take care all,

Stealth Rudy

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Mommy Came Back

I knew Smudgie was lying. Why oh why do I EVER listen to that little creep?

She came back last night and gave us pats and hugs and I was so tired by that point that Smudgie and I gave her some kisses and then headed up to bed. I hope we didn't hurt her feelings.

Today, something really interesting happened.

Cousin Jzero and Grandpa came over and they helped Daddy make the floor all fancy. They worked in my bedroom first, and almost got it finished. Daddy says they'll do three more rooms tomorrow. Mommy called Daddy something like "poptimistic" or maybe it was "schmopitimistic." Either way, I think that's a lot for one day...maybe they'll do some more next weekend.

Smudgie was terrified of the tools and noise and work (big surprise) and he spent most of the day hiding in his crate. But I wasn't scared.

I helped.

I inspected the pieces, gave licks of encouragement, and stood right beside the big noisy saw without running away. I even made sure the tools were being properly rotated by bringing some of them down to the livingroom every now and then. Just to keep things fresh. Mommy laughed every time she came to get them. Silly Mommy.

When everyone left Smudgie was still too scared to go in the bedroom but I wasn't. Mommy and Daddy and I all sat on the floor and I gave it another important test. I did the nap test on it, and it passed. It would have been nice to sleep a little longer but Mommy thought I looked cute with my paws all curled up under my head, and then she told Daddy, and he looked at me and he laughed and called me a goof and then I had to get up and move.

I'm very sensitive in that way you know.

So, they are coming back to see me tomorrow and they might even put down some more flooring. I'll miss the old carpet though. It smelled like pee, and I have always found that somewhat comforting.

Smudgie eventually did test out the floor, but he walked funny and kept his bum curled under. Apparently he's also afraid of floors. What a chicken poop.

Anyway, I should end this now. I'm hoping to get another round of napping in on my nice, cool floor.

Take care all. And have more floor naps.

ConstuctoRudy

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

MY MOMMY IS LEAVING US!


I saw the pink flowered suitcase thingie. I know what that means.

She's leaving us again.

Hudson says it's forever.

He says it's because I was so much trouble this week. He says it's also because I peed on the globe light and now Mommy doesn't want to be here anymore.

He says it's all my fault.

I'm sorry Mommy. I'm sorry. It just looks so pretty when I pee on your globe lights. I'll try to stop. Don't go. Don't go. Don't leave me.

(I just don't get why Smudgie finds her leaving so funny. He loves her too, and he'll miss her, and he knows that DADDY never fills the water bowls so we'll probably die within a few days anyhow...)

Don't go Mommy. Don't go.

Why is this happening again? We need you home. Daddy doesn't do it right. Ever.

Take care all, and don't leave your family behind. It's not fair.

Rudy "I Pack Really Light and Would Love to Come Too" Patootie

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

My Family Takes Really Good Care of Me

Why oh why do I doubt them?

Yesterday I wasn't feeling so well. Mommy immediately made an appointment for me to go to the vet. I was happy for the car ride, but I flipped out in the parking lot and behaved badly. Now they all think I'm a bad dog. Mommy says I need to learn to let this all go and try liking other dogs, and I know I should, but I just can't.

So I was rushed through the waiting room, and saw Dr. K. I don't know why I was so scared. He was so nice, but I dribbled pee when he first started checking me over. Why? Why did I do that? He was really nice. He petted me, and got down on the floor with me, and he really liked me. So what was I so afraid of?

He stuck a thermometer you know where, and even that wasn't as bad as it could have been.

I had a small owie on my tummy. He cleaned it up and put medicine on it and made it feel good. He checked me all over. He gave me some other medicine for my sore tummy and I enjoyed my dinner a few hours later, so that was a good thing.

Then these nice ladies held me in a wrestling hold and poked me with a needle. I didn't like it, but they patted me and kissed me and told me I was good, so it isn't like that was horrible.

Mommy says Dr. K is going to check my blood for illnesses you can get from woodticks, just to be safe. You may remember that Mommy and Daddy took one off my beautiful nose a while back. Dr. K wants to make sure that I was just limping because I overdid it when I went roller blading, and not that there is something bad that a tick put in my blood.

I feel a lot better this morning. I'm looking forward to Mommy putting more medicine on my tummy.

I have a great family. When I wasn't feeling well they took me straight to the vet, and they didn't even gripe that it cost three hundred dollars! Think of how many cheeseburgers that would buy.

Mommy always says that now that I have a family they will always take care of me and love me and make sure everything is okay for me. I've been here more than a year and a half and they still do all that for me.

It's awesome.

Take care all. Be good to your family.

Family Man Rudy

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Mommy says Daddy is working late...

I miss him so much.

I have been sitting at the window, waiting, since dinner. Now it's after ten and he's still not home.

Mommy told us he was working late tonight, but Smudgie says she's lying. Smudgie says he's never coming home and that it's all because I peed on Mommy's fancy globe light last night. Smudgie says we'll never ever see him again and that it's all my fault.

I'm not sure why that would make Daddy run away. Last night he laughed and thought it was funny. It was only Mommy who was unhappy and she's still here and feeding us.

So Daddy, PLEASE come home. We miss you and cannot go to bed without you to snuggle.

My heart is breaking in two.

I'm sorry I peed on the globe. I'll never do it again....or if you really liked it, I'll do it from now on. Sorry Mommy.

Daddy......

Take care all....and always come home to your puppies.

Rudy, the Bereft

Monday, August 8, 2011

Hudson Keeps Locking Me Out of the TV Room

I don't know what to do about this. When Mommy and Daddy watch TV upstairs they go into the TV room, and they invite us. I stay for a bit, but then I usually like to go check out the bedroom. I look out the window, and sleep on the bed, and chew my ring. I feel safe knowing where my uprights are if I need them.

But then, after a brief nap, I wake up and I miss them.

So I head over the TV room to see them, and when Smudgie hears me coming he pushes the door closed.

That leaves me locked in the hallway.

Sigh.

I usually go to sleep outside the door, waiting for Mommy to take a bathroom break, or for Daddy to go for a snack, but it's so lonely.

Sometimes Mommy and Daddy notice that Smudgie does it, so they come, open the door, and invite me in. When they do that my heart sings. But sometimes they don't notice. And sometimes he does it while I'm still on the bed and so they check and I'm not there yet and then they don't check again when I am there.

Why is Smudgie so mean to me?

I kicked the door open a couple times and just walked in, and Mommy and Daddy praised me and said I was smart, but then Smudgie gave me "the look" and now I don't open it myself anymore.

So, I am spending way too much time in the hallway away from my family. Oh woe is me. Woe is Rudy!

Can someone please come by and make Hudson be NICER!?

Take care all, and always check your hallways for loved ones. It's not nice to feel left out.

Long Haul Rudy

Friday, August 5, 2011

I noticed I haven't posted any pictures lately, so here's one...












This is my friend Rack. He destroys our garbage every night. Smudgie and I bark at him sometimes, in the wee hours. I know Mommy and Daddy appreciate that.

I overheard Mommy and Daddy talking a while back. They said that locking garbage cans would keep Rack from making messes, but then they said, "The little dude's gotta eat."

I think my Mommy and Daddy are good people. They even take care of Rack. And I know Rack's not cuddly like we are.

Take care all, and always care for others.

Rudy, Interspecies Social Activist

I was part of a Pack Nap today.

Mommy always talks about Pack Naps, but this summer she hasn't been sleeping at all. I really admire her, though. Even on no sleep she's always pleasant and sweet. I wonder how she does that?

But today we laid down for a pack nap, and for the first time she slept.

She slept for four hours. It was cool.

So, a pack nap, as Mommy explained it, goes like this:

First, all dogs must get OFF the bed. That was my least favourite part.

Then the Mommy makes the bed all nice and smooth and pretty.

Then the Mommy gets in the bed while the dogs must wait. That part was hard.

Then, when you feel like the anticipation is going to make you explode, the Mommy invites the dogs to jump back up and find a really nice, comfy spot. Snuggling is strongly encouraged.

Finally, the Mommy wraps her arms around the dogs, and all three fall asleep together.

And that's just what happened, except Mommy never sleeps when we pack nap, but today she did, for four hours.

It was so nice sleeping all snuggled up in someone's arms. I was extra good. I ignored all the noises outside and didn't run to the window to bark even once.

When Mommy woke up I was still in her arms, but Smudgie had snuck down to the foot of the bed...he says he got hot. She forgave him though.

Then we celebrated by eating our dinner outside on the deck. It was like a picnic. Very very cool.

I hope we can pack nap more often! I think this might be something I am especially good at.

Take care all, and remember, naps are good.

Rudy, who wonders if he wore his special walking vest to bed....would it be a backpacknap? It might be good to bring snacks and water to the next one....hmmmm.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Mommy is my hero!

She is so brave,

And strong,

And observant,

And she saved me!

Well, Daddy helped a little but she made him.

I had something called a "woodtick" on my perfect little nose. She saw it (I didn't even know it was there) and she organized the the extraction, and she coached Daddy, and then she put some special goo on my nose where the "woodtick" had been, and then finally she kissed me right on the nose.

The kiss was the best part.

Daddy was in charge of removing the tick from the premises. Mommy's not a fan of killing anything so he had to relocate it away from us.

Mommy patted me and Smudgie all over after. She says it's to check for ticks, but I think it's because we're so awesome.

Take care all, and watch for blood sucking little fiends.

Rudy "Tick Magnet" Patootie (but to be clear there were no ticks found on my amazing bum)

I really am my own worst enemy.

Well, it happened again. Last night Mommy gave me and Smudgie each another cherry tomato, and I felt obligated to eat it, so I did, and guess what? Still yuck!

I decided to do less chewing and more "close your eyes and down it goes" so at least that helped a little. But I vowed no more. Never again. NO MORE TOMATOES.

So what did I do to myself today?

I went out for a pee, sniffed around the tomato plants and found a small green apple on the ground, or so I thought.

I brought it in and bit into it and it was HORRIBLE. It wasn't a little green apple at all. It was a little green TOMATO.

THE HORROR.

And Mommy laughed and laughed at me.

And since I bit into it I had green tomato juice in my mouth. I ran for a drink of water but even that really didn't help much. I can't believe I did this TO MYSELF. I went tomato hunting.

Later I tried to give it to Smudgie but he wasn't interested. He says the green ones are not for eating, and laughed and asked what I was thinking. He said even if I did think it was a little green apple, any little green apple that small would be too bitter to eat. How was I supposed to know any of this? He says he's older and wiser. Yeah, by what, nine months. Big whoop. I bet he doesn't know how to survive a gator attack.

So, the stinky little green tomato sits in the living room, on the floor, calling my name and giggling evilly. I know eventually I'll have to eat it. It would be rude to leave that mess for Mommy, but I must work my way up to it.

For now it just sits there, taunting, mocking, and laughing at me.

Can no one save me?

Take care all, and watch out for Killer Tomatoes!

Rudy, who would rather wrassle a gator right now

(Which, by the way, reminds me, my hero BILLY THE EXTERMINATOR is on TV tonight with a brand new season. I'll have to get past this tomato incident before I can relax and watch it. Maybe he'll have some tips for getting rid of tomatoes!)